Some thoughts on paper...

The Nullabor awaits in the next few days as we head toward Kalgoorlie today. Nat is having a drive while I am noting some thoughts into the phone for Z & Mav so that when they can read & understand it, they will appreciate how lucky they have been. I apologise for my poor spelling & syntax in any previous or future posts, but notes in the iPhone on the road doesn't lend itself to mistake free English...

 As we head east now, our thoughts change. We are headed home in a sense and we/I are coming to the realisation this journey has gone quickly and will end the same way.

The conversation has changed from things we have done and where we are going, to school bags, storage sheds and day care.....and I am not entirely happy about it.

The reality is that we have to put the boys through school and plan long term for our retirement. I am 40 after all this month..... Work will be waiting for us and we need to get smart on things - now that the boys will be in school.

This hasn't stopped us talking about selling up and going for 3 years, although Nat quickly stops that thought, 6 months will be enough for her she tells me.

The speak often about it, but the eventual situation for us is inner city unit by the water, perhaps Broadbeach, and to do cruises to see the bits of the world we haven't by then. We did this trip now because we don't want to do it as retirees, which is why we took the opportunity while it was on offer.

Personally, as much as this circumnavigation is about the boys, it is as much for me and working on my impatience and self centered-ness. The reports are good if you speak to Nat, I still have my moments but the fuse takes a lot longer to reach the detonator.

When the boys read this later in life they will probably say I am still an asshole, but hopefully a lovable one....

I find myself talking with others and centering the conversation about the experiences the boys are having rather than ours (you may have sensed this from the flavour of my blog posts!!) I want to make sure that upon my return I place them first and ensure I maneuver my interests and work commitments around theirs & Mums. I also want to apply some of my learnings to my managerial style also. This all might sound incredulous to some but it is my personal commitment.

Nat and I are great, for us there was never any real concern about how we would get on. We communicate well and laugh which is good. It certainly has been great for us too. Again, there are moments but they are few and we manage to laugh about it soon after. The boys only witness good things with us which will make them all the better adults and respectful of other humans. Even the slightest tone change in our discussion is jumped upon by Z and we are told to (in a sense) "pull our heads in" in a way only a 5 year old can express. How can we stay irate after this??

All I can say is that I don't really want to come back, but know we need to. Loads of memories and personal growth from all of us, 182 days in a small space traveling constantly will do that to you & I would never change it for anything.

From the labyrinth inside the mind of Jason......